Sunday, March 7, 2010
Ben came to church today. He slept through most of the service. I took him into the crying room to change his diaper. He was a bit fussy. I had brought a bottle of breastmilk in case he got hungry. There was another mom in the room playing with her daughter who was about 4 months old. They nursed off and on while I was in there. I felt the peer pressure to nurse instead of use the bottle. I caved and nursed Ben a bit from one breast. It's not that I don't want to nurse Ben it's just that I need to get back on my pumping schedule. If I were able to be at home and nurse on demand I wouldn't care about a schedule. I just want to be comfortable. My breasts get overfull when I nurse in between pumpings. I am torn. I know what is best for Ben from one moment to the next. He has a right to nurse whenever I am with him. But then I try to look at what is best for him in the long run. Keeping my supply up and being able to make milk for weeks or months to come is best for Ben too. There really aren't any good or right decisions here.